You: “She’s medium height, has short brown hair, lots of piercings, and wears a lot of plaid.”
Your best bro: “Dude, you’re gonna have to be a LITTLE more specific than that.”
Submitted by Outdoorlove
Overtly rejoicing in death should not be the American way. No matter how horrible the person was. I understand and agree that the death of Bin Laden was for the betterment of the world, however i find the amount of celebration in his death rather disturbing. a person is dead! a bullet lodged into the side of his head, and Americans are cheering. We should rejoice, but we should also recognize the blood spilled. No Americans were harmed in the raid. Bin Laden and four other men were killed in the attack. As well as a woman who one of the men used as a human shield. Think before you raise your glass.
Visits brother school -
Feels like Mulan.
You throw an aluminum can in the trash and feel guilty.
You only honk your horn if collision is imminent and never for anything else.
You consider something a “hill” (not a mountain) if it doesn’t have snow on it or has not recently erupted, regardless of its altitude.
You consider “etiquette” a foreign word.
You find a wallet with $500 and give it back to the owner.
You used to live somewhere else but won’t admit it publicly.
You conciser coffee an art form
You know a bride & groom that registered at REI.
Every day is casual Friday.
Hear the word “ferry” and think of boats and long waits.
Know at least eight people who work for Intel or Nike, or used to work for Tektronix.
You think skiing always means being covered from head to toe, in snow or water.
Know that Boring is a town and not just a state of mind.
Have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain.
You design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit under a raincoat.
You return from a California vacation depressed because “all the grass was dead.”
Remember the date, severity, time of day, where you were, and how long you were out of power and phone service for every winter severe weather event in the last five years.
Have ever called your insurance agent to ask if your homeowner’s policy covers falling trees, flooding, or mud slides
You never go camping without waterproof matches, ponchos, and mattress pads that double as flotation devices.
You believe swimming is not a sport but a survival skill to prevent boating deaths.
You own more than 10 articles of clothing that have the names of microbreweries/brewpubs printed on them. A 25 story building is your definition of “a REALLY tall structure”You replace your hiking boots with Birkenstock, Chaco, or Teva sandals when the weather gets above 47 degrees.
You believe people who use umbrellas are wimps or Californians, or both.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Oregon.